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Thursday, January 21, 2010

Loving God

If ye love me, keep my commandments.  John 14:15

He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: . . . John 14:21

Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: . . . .  John 14:23

He that loveth me not keepeth not my sayings: . . . .  John 14:24

I love him, I love him not!

Is it possible that these sobering words from Jesus can at the same time be a source of comfort and consternation.  That is what they are to me!

I love him therefore I keep his commandments and words.  I do not keep them perfectly or at times even consistently, therefore I do not love him as I ought, and certainly not as he deserves.  I do not know that I will ever love him as I should in this life.  I want to love him, I desire to love him, and at times I do love him with an obedience that amazes me; an obedience that causes me to humbly admit I only love him with his love that has been shed abroad in my heart by the Holy Ghost.  Then there are the other times, the times of disobedience and unbelief; the times when I don't love him; the times when self-interest assumes the helm and I am propelled by the flesh and carnal interest.

I guess I find myself in the awkward place of loving him more than I ever have and yet realizing I do not love him as I ought.  The words of Jesus in John fourteen keep me thankful, humble, and longing.  Thankful I love him as much as I do.  Humble when I consider that I love him because he first love me.  Longing to love him more!
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